Turkey hunting is a spring sport that includes lots of bugs and sweating and usually sitting very still for long periods. Matthew has taken our girls turkey hunting since they were old enough to shoot a gun. They hunt with him every year and love it! The stories they tell me while shedding off tick infested gear includes HUGE spiders crawling across their face while sitting behind a bush full of baby spiders. Black bears walking up on them and breathing down their neck. Sweating buckets while trying to hold still as hordes of mosquitoes suck the life out of them. And then the dreaded checking for ticks after…not a problem for them. Me? Not interested.
So, when Matthew told me that he and our daughters got drawn for a turkey hunt in Kansas, I was like, “yay for ya’ll! Enjoy the mosquitoes and ticks!”
But as the date drew closer and the time away from my kids stretched from our last visit, I was getting jealous that Matthew would get to spend a few days with our girls and I wouldn’t get to see them. I decided to go. Even if I had to be mizz for a few days.
Matthew asked, “Are you sure you want to spend 2 days in the car just to sit around while we hunt?”
Not really, but FOMO was setting in and the promise of some burnt ends at Jack Stack’s BBQ in Kansas City on the drive home was making the trip sound bearable.
Off we go driving from Eastern NC to Kansas. Two days. In the car. With Matthew taking work calls every 15 min. Laptop in my lap answering emails while shoving candy in my face, we are a mobile office.
We arrived at Big Kansas Whitetails around 4:45PM. Just in time to catch owner, Micah, heading out for his afternoon scouting.
“Heather, you wanna tag along or hangout at the lodge?” Knowing rain was forecast for the next 3 days (I had no desire to sit in the rain AND bugs) I quickly threw on my Sitka gear and hustled to the truck.
Matthew gave me specific instructions on the short drive.
“You have to be super quiet.”
“Got it. You know that’s difficult for me. Hahaha!”
“Seriously. Like, don’t even blink. They can see everything.”
“Can they see that I need a pedicure in these boots?”
More giggles from me, eye rolls from Matthew, and a nervous grin from Micah.
Clearly, I don’t know squat about turkeys, so I searched up some info from the NWTF and Mossy Oak websites. Did you know that a female will lay 10-12 eggs and won’t stay sitting on them until the last egg is laid? So, all these females are running around calling to the males so they can breed and then go lay an egg? Every day until all their eggs are fertilized. No wonder the males are strutting around puffing up their feathers. It’s a few weeks of dancing, breeding, egg laying, and repeat until all the eggs are laid.
Like Coachella for turkeys…without all the egg laying.
We park by a patch of woods and walk along a grass covered path parallel to the woods. We round a few corners very slowly, listening and looking. The songbirds were singing; the temp was mild; critters were running up and down the trees and NO BUGS. Not bad! Beautiful actually.
I’m doing my best to keep quiet and walk in the guy’s footprints, so I don’t crunch sticks or leaves. Expecting Matthew to glare at me if I breathe too loud.
Micah stops and does some sign language to Matthew who translates to me that he sees a turkey. We sit on the ground and Matthew calls to it. Nothing. We get up and quietly, walk some more. I pull my phone out to take a picture while the guys walk up ahead, I look up, and holy crap!!! I see a turkey deep in the woods! I freeze. Matthew eventually turns around and motions “What?”.
Realizing I wasn’t moving, he reluctantly walks back to me, and I very slowly while holding my breath look in the direction of the turkey.
“Yeah, it’s a hen.” he whispers and then walks back to Micah.
Seriously?! I was so quiet and discreet! (I did mention later that night they need to come up with better hand signals.)
More creeping/walking. Matthew stops to call again and signals to me and Micah he sees a long beard! (The “goatee” signal I did understand.)
Matthew crawls up ahead to hide in the shrubs while Micah instructs me to creep to a down tree to hide. (He did say we might have to army crawl at some point to which I said, “no. I’m not crawling with the bugs.” More giggling, this time from Micah.)
Micah and I sit in the brush behind the dead tree with my phone pointing at Matthew. A few more calls from Matthew and the big bird rounds the corner up ahead of the trees. While trying not to blink or worry my silver phone case will scare the bird, I film while Micah whispers to me the play-by-play. “Here he comes. You watching?! He’s coming around the corner!”
Matthew follows the bird with his gun then, Boom! Turkey down! “Whoo-hoo” shouts Micah and tells me I’m allowed to breathe now and helps me up.
We jog to join Matthew and gawk at the big ugly bird. I immediately revert to my childhood. Like a kid, I grab it up to feel how heavy it is, then put it on a log to really check it out up close. Running my hand over the soft feathers I spread out its big wings. I stretch out the lumpy, “wart” riddled neck, cringing at the ticks stuck in between the lumps. Open its small beak and check out its tongue. It’s studded with spines facing inward that slide down its throat to keep food from crawling back up. Inspect the weird dangly flap of skin on its “nose” that strangely turns colors with its temperament. Feel the bristly texture of the beard growing through its chest. Touch the big thick-skinned feet, poking my fingers on the sharp leg spurs and ooo and aww at the beautiful feathers that are glowing iridescent in the light. It is such an odd-looking animal with very few features that are attractive.
Micah takes some pictures and hoists the bird onto his shoulder, heading back to the truck.
Back at the lodge Micah’s wife, Abby, has a spread of food laid out for all the guests.
She chills a bottle of rose’ I brought and tops off my glass before I can ask for a refill.
I have only stayed at a hunting lodge/camp a few times with people I don’t know. It’s fun to sit with a group of fellow hunters listening to all the events of the day. Even more fun when the crowd moves outside to smoke cigars, sip bourbon and talk junk around a fire. (That’s where the most colorful stories are told!)
Recap, my first turkey hunt was much more enjoyable than I was expecting. My Sitka gear kept the bugs off me, the temps were perfect, no rain, no army crawling through spider webs, and our stellar guide put us on a turkey and had us back at the lodge showered and fed by 8:00.
Seriously. Walked into the woods at 5:30 and left at 7:30.
Lodge Info:
Big Kansas Whitetails
Rantoul, KS 66079
913-238-0217
https://bigkansaswhitetails.com/
micah@bigkansaswhitetails.com
The lodge is BEAUTIFUL. With no turkey to kill, I spent the next 2 days walking the property. So pretty! The woods were teaming with deer, opossum, birds (yes, some turkeys) and cows nearby.
Our room was very clean, with a comfortable bed. There was a goose (could pass as a sitting turkey?) made of bath towels on the bed like we were arriving at a resort! The shower was fully stocked with body wash, shampoo and CONDITIONER! After a steaming hot shower I realized I didn’t bring a hair dryer, to which Micah replied, not a problem and brought me his from the enormous super organized “garage”. (they use hair driers to dry wet turkeys for photos)
Abby cooked amazing meals and had snacks available all day. Fresh ground coffee before the crew woke up and piping hot dinner as soon as they returned.
I enjoyed my coffee sitting on the back patio listening to the birds, (yes, some turkeys) and cows. So quiet and tranquil. A pair of binoculars kept me entertained for hours bird watching.
Wine and bourbon on the covered side patio in the evenings with a fire crackling in the HUGE fireplace was enough to justify the “hunt” as a vacation destination.
Ladies, if you do not hunt, but are invited to “tag-along” to Big Kansas Outdoors lodge…go. You will not be roughing it or camping, more along the lines of pampering and relaxing at a beautiful, tastefully decorated, resort in the heart of Kansas.
